Chapter 17
A quick note: “Cocolina” means “my little sweetheart” in
Italian
“Are you finished with your packing?”
“I wish,” Elizabeth sighed.
Jon Prentiss, Elizabeth’s current dance partner, chuckled. “Never
do today what you can put off till tomorrow, eh?”
“Well, I’ve done some of it,” she retorted. “They’re
not coming to pick up my stuff till first thing Friday morning, so I have all
day and all night tomorrow to finish up.”
“That doesn’t sound like a proper way to spend your final night in
New York. A pretty little thing like you, at home alone—it’s
a travesty. If I didn’t have to work, I’d at least come over and keep
you company.”
“Actually, I already turned down an offer from … someone else to do
exactly that. I’m better off on my own—I’ll get more accomplished
if I don’t have any distractions.” She scanned the room as she said
this, frowning and nibbling her lower lip.
Jon smirked. “Speaking of distractions, where is he?”
“Where is who?” Elizabeth tried not to blush.
As she expected, Jon wasn’t fooled. “Don’t be coy, sweetie,”
he drawled. “I heard the latest about Mr. Tall, Dark, and Sexy. A private
dinner at his place last night? Sounds positively delicious.”
“I take it you’ve been talking to Sally?”
He nodded. “We’re so happy for you. It’s not every day that
a friend of ours lands an Upper East Side old money type, much less one who’s
famous.”
“You make it sound like we’re engaged. There’s nothing serious
going on—we’ve just been on a couple of dates.”
“Oh, sure,” he snorted, twirling her in a tight circle. “You
forget, I’ve seen your indoor rose garden. Is there any color he hasn’t
sent you?”
She sighed and rolled her eyes. “You’re making a big deal about nothing.
As usual.”
“I hear he’s coming tonight. I must say, it broke my heart—I had hoped you were all dressed up just for me.”
“Cut it out. I am not all dressed up.” Elizabeth’s protest sounded
hollow even to her own ears.
“Mmm hmm.” Jon cast a sidelong glance at her. “Right. You always
wear your hair all fluffed out, and you put on lipstick, eye shadow, and mascara
every day. And your closet is just full of sexy little blouses that show off your …
assets.”
“Jon!” Elizabeth felt her blush extending downward in the general
direction of the aforementioned assets.
Laughing, he kissed her cheek. “Don’t be embarrassed, sweetie. You’re
absolutely gorgeous, and he’s going to think you look good enough to eat.”
“Thanks.” A shiver ran down her spine as she considered his remark.
“And speaking of eating, let’s get back to last night. Did you adjourn
to his bedroom for dessert?”
“Of course not! It wasn’t like that.”
“A pity, but I guess I’m not surprised. You never let yourself have
any fun.”
“Not this again! For the millionth time, you and I just have different
definitions of fun.”
“Not so different. Tall, dark, and sexy sounds pretty good to me too,”
Jon retorted, waggling his eyebrows.
Elizabeth smiled weakly. She glanced at her watch and saw that it was almost
11:00. Although she was reluctant to admit it, she was beginning to doubt that
William was going to appear. He had left a message on her answering machine that
afternoon explaining that he would be a bit late arriving, and apologizing for
being unable to pick her up and take her to the party. But the festivities had
started well over two hours ago, which made him much more than “a bit late.”
In addition, that afternoon Sally had questioned the wisdom of her decision
to invite William to the party. Not that I really made that much of a conscious
decision. I could scarcely think at the time, with him nibbling my ear.
Sally believed that William wouldn’t mix well with the struggling actors
and musicians who made up most of their circle of friends. Elizabeth had insisted
that everything would be fine. William, after all, was a musician too, so he had
that in common with most of the other guests. Besides, his professional life required
him to interact with a wide variety of people. But Sally’s comment had reminded
Elizabeth of Jane’s wedding rehearsal dinner, at which William had stood
in a corner in imperious solitude for much of the earlier part of the evening.
Not that concern about William fitting in at the party was Elizabeth’s
sole source of uneasiness. In a moment of weakness, she had allowed Sally to talk
her into wearing the white shirred top Jane had given her in San Francisco, the
one she had worn for her stroll on the beach with William, along with a snug pair
of black jeans. Jon had not been the first to tease her about her unusually provocative
appearance, and she was feeling twinges of impending panic. You were worried
that he might have misinterpreted your behavior last night, so what did you do
tonight? Naturally, you showed up in a clingy top with no bra. Why stop there?
Why not give him a lap dance when he gets here?
If he gets here, that is. Maybe the whole “arriving late” business
was so he’d have an excuse not to show up. Later he can say that his meeting
or appointment, or whatever it was, took even longer than he expected.
In reality, that didn’t seem very likely—William had practically
begged to see her tonight. But his phone message that afternoon had been terse,
and he hadn’t offered any explanation for the change in plans. Maybe he’s
having second thoughts. Maybe he found something better to do than to hang out
with a bunch of starving musicians. Maybe he found something better to do than
to be with me.
Elizabeth forcibly interrupted this unproductive train of thought. The private
room in the back of the club, full almost to overflowing with her friends, crackled
with energy and good spirits, and the various musicians among the group were providing
nearly continuous entertainment. At the moment, a rock music jam session was in
progress, and Jon was indulging his love of salsa dancing, leading her expertly
through an intricate series of steps. It would be foolish to let a dark-eyed,
brooding pianist diminish her enjoyment of the evening, even one as attractive
as William.
If he wants to see me, he’ll be here sooner or later. If not …
well, at the risk of sounding like Scarlett O’Hara, I’ll think about
that tomorrow.
When William saw the lighted sign proclaiming “Club MetroMania,”
he felt like Columbus sighting land after months at sea. The cab driver had dropped
him off in the center of SoHo and William had set out with great determination
but no directions. After initial attempts to find his destination without assistance,
he had sought information at a Thai restaurant, but had left the establishment
even more confused than before.
Next, he had located a pay phone, only to discover that he didn’t have
the necessary change. Another trip into a restaurant had solved this problem,
but by the time he returned to the phone with change jingling in his pockets,
his annoyance meter was pegged squarely in the red zone. He had called Richard,
who undoubtedly knew the location of every night spot in Manhattan, but his cousin
hadn’t answered his cell phone. Sure. I’ve spent the evening
fending off Mitzi Dalton, while he’s probably been snuggling up to some attractive
brunette.
While on the phone, William had been recognized by a group of Juilliard students
prowling SoHo. He had accepted their adulation, signed autographs, and answered
questions with what little patience he could muster. He had been tempted to ask
them for directions, but his pride had stopped him. Yes, a famous classical
musician, hopelessly lost in SoHo. They’d love that.
He had been on the verge of the almost unthinkable indignity of calling Sonya
for assistance when it had occurred to him that there was another, much less sarcastic,
source of help available. A quick call to Allen had set William on the right track,
and his long legs had made short work of the six-block walk to the club. Now,
finally, he stood outside the door, his heart thudding in his chest, though not
from the exercise.
With a deep breath, he stepped into the dimly-lit club. He uneasily inspected the ostentatiously
hip people
clustered around the bar, representatives of a lifestyle completely foreign to him. Others,
similarly dressed, gyrated on the dance floor to booming Latin music that made his teeth vibrate
and gave him an instant headache. He surveyed the faces but he saw no sign of Elizabeth or
Sally, the only two party guests he would recognize. What if I got the name of the place
wrong, and this isn’t where I’m supposed to be?
Then he saw a door open in the back, and he realized that the party was probably
in a private room. He pushed his way through the sea of trendy black clothing,
relieved to be appropriately dressed as a result of his afternoon shopping trip,
and passed through the door.
He saw Elizabeth almost immediately, and his heart sank. She was on the dance
floor, smiling into the eyes of a muscular blond man with a deep tan and male-model
good looks as they moved in unison to the music. From the looks of the tight embrace
in which she was engulfed, they were intimately acquainted.
The music ended, and storm clouds gathered in William’s head as Elizabeth
and her partner shared an embrace and a kiss. This must be why Sally was surprised
that Elizabeth invited me. Sally knew that Elizabeth’s lover, or boyfriend,
or whatever, was going to be here. The happy pair stayed on the dance floor,
talking and laughing. Her eyes flashed with the energy and spirit William loved
so ardently, and although he couldn’t bear to see her with another man, neither
could he wrench his eyes away from her.
The band resumed playing, and Elizabeth’s partner claimed her for another
dance. William, his stomach roiling, considered a variety of actions, including
stalking onto the dance floor and, at great peril to his hands, flattening his
rival with a punch on the jaw. Then her gaze landed on him, and her smile stole
his breath. She spoke briefly to her partner, who turned to stare at William as
she wove her way through the other dancers until she reached his side.
“Hi, William! I’m glad you made it.”
He looked down at Elizabeth, her fresh green eyes sparkling with vivacity,
her mane of dark curls cascading over her shoulders, and his mouth went dry. He
wanted to kiss her soft, full lips until she was clinging to him, moaning his
name. His hands itched to span the narrow stripe of bare stomach revealed between
the hem of her white top and the waist of her jeans. What he wanted to do to the
rest of her was something
he thought it best not to contemplate at the moment. Most of all, though, he simply
wanted to bask in her presence, to feel her light shining into the dark corners
of his mind and heart.
Her smile faded, and she stood twirling a lock of hair around her finger. He
realized that he was the cause of her uneasiness—he had been staring
at her in silence for much too long. He cleared his throat and forced himself
to speak.
“Hello,” he rasped. “I’m sorry I’m late. I … well,
it’s a long story.”
“I’m just glad you’re here now,” she replied as her smile
reappeared. “I was worried about you.”
William leaned forward to kiss her, but was interrupted by a loud “Ahem!”
He looked up, grimacing when he saw Elizabeth’s dance partner standing beside
her.
The man flashed a jovial grin. “Hi, I’m Jon Prentiss. And you must
be Mr. Tall—”
“William Darcy,” Elizabeth interrupted. William saw her stern glance
at Jon, and his answering smirk, and wondered what private message they were sharing.
With a curt nod, he shook Jon’s extended hand. “I didn’t mean
to interrupt your dance,” he said coldly. But I’m thrilled that I
did.
“No, that’s fine,” Jon replied breezily, wrapping his arm around
Elizabeth’s waist. “I’ll just get another dance—or
two or five—later. This sweet lady is one of my favorite partners.”
“I’m sure she is,” William answered, his voice tight with resentment.
Now, why don’t you wipe that smug grin off your face and get your hands
off my date.
“Well, I’ll leave you two to chat. See you later.” Jon kissed
Elizabeth on the cheek, earning himself a menacing stare from William, and sauntered
off in the direction of the bar.
William stepped close to Elizabeth in a proprietary gesture. She looked lovely,
with her creamy skin, her bright eyes framed by dark lashes, and her
lips curving into a smile that seemed almost shy. Her exotic scent teased his
nostrils and invigorated his desire, and he bent his head to kiss her. To his
dismay, Elizabeth drew away from him almost as soon as their lips met.
“I thought you’d be here earlier than this,” she said, an anxious
expression in her eyes as she scanned the room.
“I’m sorry. First I had to … well, it’s been a long evening,
that’s all.” William wasn’t sure how to explain Mitzi, so he decided
to simply omit all explanations.
“I was starting to think maybe you’d changed your mind.”
“Of course not. I said I was coming, didn’t I?” He was hurt
that she thought he would break his word, especially considering the tribulations
he had endured to be with her. He was also reeling from her reluctance to be kissed,
and his mind was busily engaged in concocting painful scenarios to explain it.
He saw her jaw tighten, and a frown line formed between her eyebrows. He belatedly
recognized that his retort had sounded harsh, but before he could apologize, she
shrugged and flashed a tight, quick smile. “Well, it doesn’t matter.
You’re here now. Come with me—I’ll introduce you around.”

About an hour later, William sat at a small table in a shadowy corner, with
only a nearly empty glass of scotch
for company. Elizabeth was dancing again, with yet another overly attentive partner, and William
fought a powerful urge to storm the dance floor, sling her over his shoulder, and carry her
out of the club. His rational self understood that she was obligated to circulate among her
guests, but his more primitive instincts were unimpressed by that argument. She’s
supposed to be my date tonight. Shouldn’t that count for something? Instead, I’m
apparently persona non grata, while she gets all warm and cozy with every other man in the
room. He drummed his fingers on the table forcefully, his brow pulled down in a deep scowl.
Elizabeth’s partner spun her in a circle, and it seemed that William could
hear her joyous laughter even above the raucous music. Powerful waves of jealousy
gnawed at his stomach and lacerated his heart as he watched her. The unfamiliar
sensation bewildered William, who had felt the sting of jealousy only once before
in his life, as a shy, sensitive teenager. And that was nothing, compared to
this.
He stood up and made his way to the bar to get another drink. William ordinarily
restricted his drinking at parties to two glasses of wine, but this was no ordinary
occasion. He had surprised himself on an earlier trip to the bar by requesting
a glass of their oldest Macallan on the rocks. “In fact,” he had said,
“make it a double.”
In a development that was entirely typical of his evening—in fact, of his entire
day—the bartender had informed him that they stocked only 10-year Macallan. Richard,
who was a connoisseur of single malt scotch and who refused to drink any vintage that wasn’t
at least of the age of consent, counted 30-year Macallan among his favorite beverages. William,
with an air of resigned suffering, had reluctantly accepted the inferior vintage, and he did
so again now.
With a sullen nod at the bartender, William returned to his table, looking
around discontentedly at the other guests as they chatted, laughed, and danced
together. Obviously they were all friends, and he was the outsider, unwelcome
in their midst. Elizabeth had introduced him to several of them, and he suspected
from the stares and whispered conversations that he was a popular topic of conversation.
The only people to approach him had been a slow but steady stream of women, attempting
to flirt with him or to lure him onto the dance floor. He had rebuffed them all
with great intrepidity, wearing his practiced mask of indifferent reserve. Although
maybe I should have said yes to some of them. Elizabeth certainly hasn’t
hesitated to dance with other men.
William would have danced with Elizabeth himself, but the idiots in the band
currently occupying the stage area apparently knew nothing but fast-paced, raucous
rock music. He appreciated most types of music, and in fact had a carefully culled
selection of classic rock CD’s at home. This particular group, though, lacked
polish and originality, and their foremost talent appeared to be loudness. In
any case, he had no plans to make a fool of himself by dancing to rock music in
a room crammed with professional dancers.
His eyes devoured Elizabeth as he gulped his scotch. She was a fluid, graceful
dancer. The gentle sway of her hips as she moved ignited a painful wave of
desire that increased to excruciating levels as he imagined her lying beneath him, undulating
sensuously through a long night of passion. He felt a familiar tightening in his
lap and swallowed hard.
I need to get a grip on myself. He snorted, his lips twisting in an
unpleasant smirk. Oh, wait, I already did that this morning in the shower.
And obviously it didn’t help in the least.
He drained his glass and again visited the bar for a refill. The scotch, despite
being underage, tasted smooth, and it was beginning to dull the ache he felt as
he watched Elizabeth dance with other men while he sat alone, pondering the distance
between New York and San Francisco.
The music stopped at last, and the band exited the stage, surrendering it to
other musicians in the crowd. William was heartened by the sight of Elizabeth
working her way across the dance floor toward him, but he nearly shouted in frustration
when her progress was impeded by a group of new arrivals who surrounded her, speaking
all at once. She darted a quick glance in his direction before the group swallowed
her up, propelling her toward the bar.
William emptied his glass in a single swallow, grimacing as it burned a path
down his throat. Enough. I don’t need to tolerate this.
He was unaccustomed to being ignored by a female in whom he had taken an interest.
In fact, he was usually the one who had to take steps to evade unwanted overtures.
After everything he had gone through to be with Elizabeth this evening, it was
humiliating to be so casually cast aside. It was time to stop embarrassing himself
by yearning for a woman who didn’t want to be with him. I should just
go home. She’d probably never even notice.
Still, despite the many indignities he had borne tonight, or perhaps because
of them, William couldn’t leave without saying a private farewell to her.
He would probably never see her again—if she didn’t care enough
about him to spend time with him when they were in the same room, she certainly
wouldn’t want to continue their relationship once they were separated by
a continent. But I can’t let her go without one last chance to memorize
the look in her eyes after I kiss her. At least her body responds to me, even
if I never found my way into her heart. That’s not much of a comfort, but
it’s all I have.
His mind felt foggy, as though his head were stuffed with cotton, and he thought
some fresh air might help. He left the private room, fighting his way through
the crowded bar area, and finally emerged onto the sidewalk in front of the club.
Car horns from passing traffic jangled his nerves, and he was jostled by people
making their way in and out of the club. But at least out here I don’t
have to watch her paying attention to everybody but me.
Elizabeth looked toward William’s table and saw that it was empty. Her
eyes rapidly scanned the room, but she failed to find the face she sought. Did
he leave? Without even saying goodbye?
It had been obvious that William wasn’t enjoying the party. He had made
no attempt to mingle, apparently preferring to sit in haughty, forbidding solitude
whenever she had to leave him to visit with her other guests. As time had passed,
he had lapsed into silence even in her presence, scarcely responding to her remarks.
His bad mood was both annoying and intimidating, and the fact that she found it
intimidating annoyed her even more.
He hadn’t even been willing to dance with her. Surprised at his failure
to ask her to dance, she had finally asked him, but he had refused in a brusque
tone. I guess Sally was right—he doesn’t belong here, and
I shouldn’t have invited him. It goes to show that I don’t know him,
or understand him, at all.
Still, she couldn’t let him leave without saying goodbye. She would probably
never see him again—his attitude tonight had made his lack of any
serious interest in her quite clear—but her uncooperative heart demanded
that she look into his deep brown eyes one last time, even if the warmth she sought
there existed only in her imagination. And then I’ll just remember that
I once spent a lovely evening under the stars with William Darcy.
She slipped out of the back room and worked her way toward the exit of the
club. As she stepped out onto the sidewalk, she saw him standing on the corner,
his back to her. His broad shoulders were slumped, his hands in his pockets, and
she sensed an almost palpable aura of loneliness engulfing him. Oh, stop trying
to psychoanalyze him. You know you’re hopeless at that. He’s probably
just bored out of his mind, and disgusted to be with people who are so far beneath
him.
Elizabeth wove her way through the crowd congregating near the entrance to
the club and approached him. When she spoke his name, his back stiffened and he
turned slowly, almost reluctantly it seemed, to face her. Her confidence ebbed
when she saw the grim set of his mouth. He crossed his arms over his chest and
regarded her in frosty silence.
“I wondered where you were,” she said. “We really haven’t
had a chance to talk yet.”
“That’s certainly not my fault.”
Elizabeth was shocked by the coldness in his voice, but she stifled her instinctive
angry retort, determined to stay on cordial terms on their last evening together.
“I’m sorry,” she said evenly. “I didn’t mean to spend
so much time away from you. But certainly you understand that I need to circulate
among my guests.”
“Of course,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders, but she saw a resentful
glint in his eyes that didn’t match his words.
“Why are you out here all alone?”
“I needed some air.” His tone was cool and dismissive, but she saw
the muscles in his jaw working.
“William, what’s wrong?”
“What makes you think anything’s wrong?”
Elizabeth summoned every ounce of patience she possessed and kept her voice
calm. “You’re obviously angry about something. Why don’t you just
tell me what it is.”
“No, I wouldn’t want to keep you from your other guests.” His
words were drenched in bitterness.
“Okay, obviously I’ve offended you by not spending enough time with
you. I’m sorry about that. But this is my last chance to say goodbye to my
friends. Besides, at a party, people are supposed to mingle and circulate, not
stay parked at their individual tables all evening.”
“I’m aware of that, but I thought you asked me here as your date.”
“Yes, I did. But that didn’t mean I intended to spend every moment
of the evening stapled to your side. Certainly you knew that as the guest of honor,
I would have responsibilities.”
“But—” He stopped, and again she saw his jaw muscles
clench.
“What?” she asked in a tight voice.
He shook his head, his eyes narrowed. “It’s not important.”
Elizabeth considered pressing him for an explanation, but she wasn’t inclined
to indulge his petulant mood. “Besides, even if my plan had been to attach
myself to you all evening, that would have been impossible, considering how late
you got here.”
“You didn’t appear to be suffering from my absence.”
Her temper flared. “What are you talking about?”
“Never mind.” He shoved his hands into his pockets, scowling.
“No, it’s too late for that. What did you mean?”
William stared at her briefly, and then spoke. “When I got here, you were
on the dance floor. Your partner was all over you, and I saw you kiss him.”
“And just what are you implying?”
“You tell me.” His eyes bored into hers. “You and Jon looked
pretty cozy together.”
“Jon? You think Jon and I are—” Her anger melted away
in the face of the absurdity of the situation. She stifled a giggle and arranged
her features in a dispassionate expression. “No, that’s not true. Jon
is just a good friend.”
“I have eyes, Elizabeth. I saw the two of you together.”
Setting William’s mind at ease about Jon would have been a simple matter,
but she decided that she didn’t owe him any explanations, not when he was
choosing to leap to such insulting conclusions. “Well, believe what you want,”
she said in a matter-of-fact tone, “but I’m telling you that he’s
a friend, and that’s all. Besides, the main reason I was dancing with him
was because my date hadn’t arrived yet.”
“I couldn’t help it. I got here as soon as I could.”
So you’ve said. But that doesn’t make it true.
He eyed her intently, obviously waiting for a response. She stared back, challenging
him with her silence. His hand combed roughly through his hair.
“I would have been here much earlier, but things kept going wrong,”
he said.
“What happened?”
“Gran needed me to go to a charity event that she couldn’t attend.
And I was there longer than I planned because … well, it’s not important.”
It must involve a woman, the way he’s avoiding talking about it. Somebody
he doesn’t want me to know about. Still, at least they were having an
actual conversation instead of trading verbal jabs, and she was relieved that
the tension between them had eased.
He continued. “Then I had to go home and change, or else show up here
in a tuxedo.”
Elizabeth’s lips twitched. “That wouldn’t have bothered me.
You looked very nice in your tux last night. Though I like what you’re wearing
tonight too. You look wonderful.”
She hadn’t intended to make that admission, but she was glad that it had
slipped out when she saw the harsh lines in William’s face melt away. A small,
sexy smile crept around the corners of his mouth. “Thank you,” he murmured.
“So do you.”
Elizabeth was annoyed to feel her pulse quicken. Stop being such a weakling!
He’s acted like the hind end of a horse ever since he got here, but all he
has to do is flash a smile and you’re ready to fling yourself into his arms.
She took a deep breath and stepped back, opening a greater distance between
them. “We should go back inside.”
William looked disappointed. “I thought you wanted to hear about my problems
getting here.”
“You mean there’s more?”
“Allen was driving Gran, so I had to take a cab home. And then another
cab here.” William’s tone was awash in self-pity.
“A cab?” Elizabeth gasped in mock horror.
William raised an eyebrow. “Now you’re making fun of me.”
“A little,” she replied with a grin. “Sorry, I just couldn’t
resist. But I’m impressed that you made such a sacrifice to be here. And
look at the bright side—at least you didn’t have to take the
subway.”
Elizabeth could see William trying not to smile, but finally his dimples appeared.
Their eyes met, and she felt warmth spreading through her as she remembered the
exquisite sensation of his lips—and body—pressed against
hers the night before. She felt a magnetic pull, and she slowly stepped toward
William, her eyes locked on his.
A shouting match between two pedestrians crossing the street broke the spell,
and Elizabeth froze in place. Her cheeks reddened when she realized that she had
been on the verge of wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him passionately
in a public place. Didn’t I used to have some discretion and self-control?
So much for that.
“Come on,” she said with a rueful smile. “Let’s get back
to the party.”
Elizabeth extended her hand, and after a moment of hesitation William engulfed
it in his. Hands clasped, they walked back into the club and made their way through
the crowd.
William was calmer now, despite continuing doubts about Elizabeth’s relationship
with Jon. His head had unfortunately not cleared as much as his mood, and he resolved
to drink nothing but water or coffee for the rest of the evening.
When they reached the door to the back room, Elizabeth turned and looked up
at him. “Why didn’t you want to dance with me earlier?”
“All they’ve been playing is fast rock music. I was waiting for something
slow.” William held open the door for her.
“I wish you’d said something,” she replied as she passed through
the doorway. “The musicians are all friends of mine, and I’m sure I
could have persuaded them to play a slow song. I thought you just didn’t
want to dance with me.”
“No, of course I—”
“There you are!” Sally exclaimed, rushing toward them. “We’ve
been waiting for you, Lizzy. Get up on stage—it’s your turn to
perform.”
“Me? No, not tonight.”
“Yes, absolutely tonight. Come on, roomie—this is your swan
song, so to speak. The guys have been waiting for you”
Sally gestured toward the stage area, which was occupied by a jazz band. The
band members gestured to Elizabeth to join them. She turned to William with an
apologetic smile.
“I guess I’d better do this. I used to sing with them in clubs, so
it’s kind of a farewell performance.”
William nodded. “I’d love to hear you sing again.” All day,
he had been regretting not asking Elizabeth to sing for him last night at his
house.
He claimed a seat directly in front of the band as Elizabeth conferred with
them. Jon Prentiss strolled over and draped his arm around her shoulders. He said
something William couldn’t hear, perhaps because of all the noise he was
making grinding his teeth.
“No, not that one,” William heard her say to Jon. “You sit down
and stop causing trouble.”
And do it now, or I’ll go up there and drag you off the stage and out
of this place.
As though he had read William’s thoughts, Jon walked away from Elizabeth;
however, to William’s dismay, he plopped into an empty chair at William’s
table.
“How you doin’?” Jon asked.
“Very well, thank you.” William knew he sounded priggish, but he
couldn’t help it. Self-assured, swaggering men like Jon had always made him
nervous, causing him to retreat into excessive formality.
“Lizzy’s quite a girl, isn’t she?”
“Yes, she is. You seem to know her quite well.” A little too well,
in fact.
“Yeah, I do. I’m going to miss her a lot.”
“So am I.” A wave of dark misery washed over William.
Jon patted William’s forearm sympathetically, and then looked at him in
surprise. “Say, what kind of workouts do you do? You’re in pretty good
shape for a guy who plays the piano for a living.”
Odd question. “I run almost every day, plus a little bit
of weight training.”
“Well, it works for you. Strong arms, nice broad shoulders, decent chest
from what I can tell, and … well, I’ve been hoping you’d get out
on the dance floor so I could see you in action.”
William couldn’t think of a single thing to say, so he simply stared at
Jon in mute astonishment.
“I can sure see why Lizzy’s so crazy about you,” Jon continued in
a conspiratorial tone. “Can’t blame her at all—the girl
has impeccable taste in men. If she hadn’t seen you first …” He
raised his eyebrows suggestively.
“Um … uh … thank you,” William stammered, unsure of the appropriate
response.
Jon sighed. “Of course, I’ve seen the way you look at her. I’m
pretty sure you don’t park on my side of the street, so to speak.”
William’s mind was reeling from two important discoveries. First, there
was obviously no need to be jealous of Jon and Elizabeth’s relationship.
But why didn’t she just explain that Jon was gay? Certainly she realized
that if I’d known that, I would have believed what she said about their relationship.
His second discovery, though, was even more provocative. Jon claims that
she’s crazy about me! She and Jon seem like close friends, so she
might have confided in him. Maybe she really said something like that. And if
she did, then—
A flourish from the drummer attracted the crowd’s attention. Elizabeth
stepped to the microphone.
“Hi, everybody. Thanks so much for coming tonight; I’m glad to have
this chance to see everybody before I leave. I’m going to miss you all so
much, and I hope if you’re ever out west you’ll look me up. I could
go on, but I’d probably just start getting weepy, so I’ll spare you
that. Instead, I’ll say a special ‘thank you’ to Jon and Sally
for making the party arrangements.”
There was scattered applause. Jon popped out of his chair and blew kisses to
the crowd.
“And I’ve gotten my arm twisted into singing,” Elizabeth continued.
“So here goes.”
Hearty applause greeted this comment, and the crowd fell silent. After a brief
pause, Elizabeth began to sing. William stared at her, mesmerized by her beauty
and by the sweet clarity of her voice. She seemed at first to be avoiding looking
at him, but soon their eyes locked, and he held her gaze as the song continued.
Listen to the song
Let’s build a stairway
to the stars,
A lovely stairway to the stars.
It would be heaven to climb to heaven with you.
We’ll hear the sound
of violins
Out yonder where the blues begin.
The moon will guide us as we go drifting along.
Can’t we sail away
on a lazy daisy petal
High on the crest of a hill?
Can’t we sail away on a little dream
And settle high on the crest of a thrill?
We’ll build a stairway
to the stars,
A lovely stairway to the stars.
It would be heaven to climb to heaven with you.*
William sat in utter bliss as Elizabeth sang to him. The lyrics evoked an image
of the two of them, hand in hand, climbing a shimmering staircase together, which
soon became the stairs to his third-floor retreat at the townhouse. He pushed
aside the harsh reality—that this vision would never come to pass—and clung to the fantasy.
The song ended long before William was ready to drift back to earth. For a
moment after she finished, Elizabeth stood unmoving, still gazing into William’s
eyes, but when the applause began she blinked hard and looked away, acknowledging
the audience with sincere, if somewhat distracted, appreciation.
As she stepped away from the stage area, the band began to play a gentle ballad.
She approached William and extended her hand. With a dismissive nod to Jon, William
rose to his feet, and together they moved to the dance floor.
“Did you request a slow song?” he murmured as he drew her into his
arms.
“Of course. I told you they’d play my requests.”
William smiled but didn’t respond, preferring to memorize the feeling
of holding her close to him. He knew that he would replay this moment frequently
in the lonely days and nights to come.
They danced in silence until Elizabeth giggled. “You know, I think this
is the first time we’ve danced indoors, or when there were other people around.”
William chuckled. “You’re right. About time we did something conventional.
But I think I preferred the atmosphere the other two times.”
“I forgot to thank you earlier for the orchid.”
“You’re entirely welcome. If it’s too difficult for you to carry
on the plane, I can have it professionally packed and shipped.”
“No, it should be fine. I’ll figure out a way to protect it. I’m
not taking that much stuff with me on the plane.”
“I meant what I said. I hope the orchid will remind you of me.” Because
I’m going to be thinking of you every hour of every day.
Elizabeth’s only answer was to nestle closer to William, resting her head
on his shoulder. She sighed, a sound full of contentment, and he tightened his
arms around her. They danced in silence as he continued to commit every detail
to memory—the softness and warmth of her body against his, the enticing
sweetness of her scent, the thick curtain of hair tumbling down her back, feeling
like rumpled silk against his fingers.
He bent his head and brushed his lips against her forehead. She looked up at
him, her eyes luminous, and for a time William forgot to breathe.
“I have to kiss you,” he whispered. He lowered his head, but she
drew back.
“Not here. Not now.” Yet her eyes were fastened on his lips, her
expression full of hunger and yearning.
“Why not?” William demanded. “You kissed Jon out here on the
dance floor. So apparently he can kiss you in front of your friends and that’s
fine, but if I’m involved it’s an embarrassment?”
“I’m just … well, I like to keep private things private, that’s
all. Jon is just a friend, so when he kisses me it’s … different.”
Relief flooded William’s mind, and he forced himself to relax. She’s
saying that a kiss from Jon doesn’t mean anything, but that with me it does.
“All right,” he said, adopting a tone of cheerful resignation. “I
understand, and I guess I’ll have to wait till later. But you owe me a kiss,
and I’m compounding interest even as we speak. I’d better warn you that
you’re going to owe me quite a few kisses by the time we get back to your
apartment, and I fully intend to collect on the debt.”
William’s teasing grin faded when he saw Elizabeth’s uneasy expression.
She began to speak, paused, and then began again. “William, I—”
The song ended, and she was interrupted by the applause of the crowd.
“Please, go on,” he urged her gently. “What’s the matter?”
Elizabeth hesitated, and then shook her head quickly. “Nothing.”
“No, something’s bothering you. Please tell me. I really want to
know.” He stroked her hair in a reassuring gesture.
Elizabeth pressed her lips together, and then looked up at him. “It’s
just that—”
Three women sitting at a table near the dance floor called out to Elizabeth.
“Lizzy, come here. We’ve been waiting all evening to hear more about
your job.”
William’s heart sank. She had been on the verge of confiding something
important—that much had been obvious. Now, instead, she was about
to be torn away from him again, and he would have to resume his lonely seat at
the table. I suppose I don’t have to be alone. Jon would probably be only
too happy to sit down and flirt with me some more.
As William turned away to return to his table, Elizabeth caught his hand. “Where
are you going? Come with me; we’ll pull up another chair. If you don’t
mind being the only man at a table with four women, that is.”
As long as you’re there, that’s all that matters. “I
think I can survive.”
Retaining her grasp on his hand, Elizabeth drew him forward to introduce him
to her friends.
From then on, the evening had gone well. Elizabeth had kept William by her
side most of the time, and had refused all further offers to dance except those
from William himself. He had been able to relax somewhat, and had occasionally
entered into a conversation about music, or about his career, with some of the
other guests.
It was very late, and the last of the guests had finally departed. William
and Elizabeth were sharing a table with Sally and Jon, both of whom were yawning
at regular intervals. William had telephoned Allen a few minutes ago, and he was
en route to the club.
“I can’t believe how late it is,” Jon said with an exaggerated
yawn. “We’ve been here so long, we’ve probably missed the introduction
of Donatella’s fall line.”
“Good party,” Sally remarked.
“Yes, it was,” Elizabeth said. “You two did a great job—thanks again. But I’m so sorry Craig didn’t show up. I was hoping he’d
have come to his senses by now.”
Sally shrugged. “Who needs
the SOB?”
she declared, but her solemn eyes told a different story.
William’s anxiety level was climbing rapidly. As Elizabeth had mentioned,
Sally’s boyfriend Craig had not appeared, which meant that there had been
no opportunity for them to reconcile following their break-up the previous evening.
Sally would thus be returning to the apartment, and would be an all-too-effective
deterrent to any attempted romance.
Furthermore, William had had too much to drink and he knew it. While he didn’t
seem to be exhibiting any physical symptoms of inebriation, he was aware that
his mind was operating at a sluggish pace.
“Come on, kiddo, let’s get a cab,” Jon said, pulling Sally to
her feet.
“I don’t understand,” Elizabeth said, setting down her nearly-empty
wine glass. “Sally, why are you going with Jon? William’s taking me
home—why don’t you just come with us?”
William winced inwardly but was about to echo Elizabeth’s offer when Sally
surprised him.
“No, didn’t I tell you?” she said. “Jon and I are going
to have a slumber party.”
“You’re going to do what?” Elizabeth asked.
“We have an early audition tomorrow morning, and he lives closer to the
theater than you and I do, so I thought I’d bunk at his place. That way I
won’t disturb you when I have to get up at some ungodly hour. I brought an
overnight bag with me tonight so I could go straight to his place.”
Elizabeth frowned. “You’ve never mentioned this audition before.”
“We just found out about it a day or two ago,” Sally answered, a
little too quickly.
William intercepted Jon’s smirk and understood the situation at once.
Well, how about this! I may have to revise my opinion of these two.
“What’s the audition for?” Elizabeth’s puzzled expression
held a dash of skepticism. Obviously she was catching on as well.
“What difference does it make?” Jon asked breezily. “Come on,
Sal. Let’s make like a baby and head out. If we don’t get some sleep
we’ll be tripping over the bags under our eyes at the audition.”
As William said good night to the pair, Jon gave him a rakish grin and a wink.
William glanced at Elizabeth, relieved to see that she was talking with Sally
and hadn’t noticed.
Now, at last, they were alone. William turned to Elizabeth, who was staring
into space and playing with her hair.
“Allen must be outside by now. Are you ready to go?”
Elizabeth nodded and smiled. It was a tentative smile, but her eyes were warm.
As they exited the back room and passed for the last time through the now-quiet
club, one thought filled his mind, repeating in an endless loop.
Don’t screw this up. Don’t screw this up. Don’t screw this
up.
Elizabeth’s stomach fluttered wildly as Allen pulled the car away from
the club. She and William were alone—well, almost alone—and once they reached her apartment they would be entirely on their own. She had
been both anticipating and fearing this moment all evening. William shifted closer
to her and took her hand, interlacing his fingers with hers.
She smiled at him, squeezing his hand. “I know you didn’t have much
fun tonight. I’m sorry about that—I should have realized that
it wouldn’t be your kind of thing.”
William shrugged. “It was fine. I enjoyed the last hour or so very much.
And, besides, we’ve finally gotten to the part of the evening I’ve been
looking forward to—being alone with you.”
Elizabeth turned away from him and stared out the window, hoping to conceal
her growing anxiety. She drew in a sharp breath as William traced his thumb across
her palm, stroking it with a delicate touch that sent ripples of pleasure up her
arm. Just when she thought she couldn’t bear the delightful torture any longer,
he released her hand and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, drawing her closer
to him.
“I wish you’d change your mind and let me stop by tomorrow night,”
he said, toying with a lock of hair that fell over her shoulder. “I’m
sure Mrs. Reynolds would be happy to make tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches
again.”
“Mmm … that was a delicious dinner. Do you suppose she could send
some chocolate mousse for dessert too?”
William chuckled softly. “I’m sure that chocolate mousse would be
no problem. But there is one condition, and it’s a deal-breaker.”
“And that would be?”
“This time, I’ll be the one delivering the dinner, and there’ll
be enough food for both of us.”
William’s long, slender fingers gently stroked up and down Elizabeth’s
bare arm. She shivered, feeling her ability to refuse him anything melting away.
“How does that sound?” William asked softly, nibbling Elizabeth’s
earlobe.
“Very … nice,” she replied in an unsteady voice, as his lips
and tongue tickled her ear, igniting little sparks of pleasure inside her. “But …
I don’t know. I really do have … a lot of packing to do. It’s going
to be a very busy day.”
“No matter how busy you are, you need to eat. Besides, I could help you
pack. And then, later, we could …” His soft, deep voice faded away as
his lips traced a path from her ear across her cheek.
“William, wait,” she whispered weakly. “Allen—”
“Is busy driving the car,” he murmured, his voice thick with desire.
She felt his warm breath against her cheek as he continued to kiss his way toward
her mouth. “He won’t notice a thing. Besides, I’ve been waiting
all evening to do this, and I can’t wait anymore.”
His mouth brushed hers softly, back and forth, tempting her to respond. When
his hands twined in her hair and and his kisses intensified, her capacity for
resistance was exhausted. Her fingers stroked the curls at his nape and she kissed
him back, the movement of his warm lips sending streaks of desire shooting through
her.
The car moved smoothly toward the Lower East Side, but the inhabitants of the
back seat were oblivious to everything but the heat they were generating as their
kisses grew deeper.
Elizabeth moaned softly as William’s tongue teased her
lips apart and slid into her mouth, stroking and exploring.
He tightened his arms around her and she
pressed against him, feeling
an unfamiliar hunger gnawing at her.
William’s mouth tasted faintly of scotch, a detail that jolted Elizabeth
back to full awareness. Wait a minute. I’m in the back seat of a car making
out with a guy, and we’ve both had too much to drink, and there’s a
driver in the front seat who could be watching us in the rear view mirror. What’s
the matter with me?
Elizabeth gently but firmly pushed on William’s chest. “We have to
stop this,” she whispered. “You may not care that Allen is in the car,
but I do.”
William heaved a sigh and leaned back against the seat. “Do you know how
many times you’ve pushed me away tonight?”
“I told you earlier, I don’t believe in public displays of …”
Affection? Lust? I have no idea what he’s feeling. Or even what I’m
feeling. “Anyway, I just think it’s better to keep private things
in private. I would think that you’d agree—you seem to be a very
private person.”
William glanced at her, and in the weak light filtering into the car she could
see a rueful grin on his face. “You’re right,” he said. “Ordinarily
I’m careful about my behavior in public. But when I’m with you, decorum
and dignity seem to go out the window. I just want to kiss you, no matter where
we are, no matter who else is around.”
He slid his arm around her shoulders, pulling her against him, and resumed
his gentle stroking up and down her arm. His soft caress raised goosebumps on
her skin, and her lips still tingled from his kisses. She rested her head on his
shoulder and closed her eyes, savoring the warmth of his body beside hers. How
can this be so relaxing, and yet so …stimulating?
Elizabeth opened her eyes, surprised when the car stopped a short time later.
She sat up and peered out the window. “We’re already here?”
“Time flies when … well, you know the expression,” William answered
with a lazy, seductive grin that made Elizabeth momentarily reconsider her prohibition
on kissing in public.
Allen opened the back door, and Elizabeth stepped out of the car while William
got out on the other side. He escorted her briskly up the walk and into the apartment
building, his hand resting lightly on the small of her back. She felt the warmth
of his fingers at her waist, left bare by the abbreviated hem of her white top.
The moment the elevator doors closed behind them, William grasped her shoulders
and drew her into his arms, capturing her mouth in a slow, deep kiss. Elizabeth
melted against him, one hand on his shoulder to steady herself, while with the
other she caressed his neck and jaw, feeling a light layer of stubble beneath
her fingers. She felt her control gradually slipping away, no match for the sultry
heat of William’s mouth.
She barely noticed when the elevator doors opened. William nudged her gently
toward the door, his lips still melded to hers, and propelled her slowly down
the hall. Only when they reached her apartment door did they stop kissing. He
loosened his hold to allow her to retrieve her key, and she fumbled in her purse
while he stroked her hair, combing his fingers through her unruly curls.
Elizabeth unlocked the door, her hands shaking. No sooner was the door closed
behind them than William’s mouth came down on hers, hot and hungry. He pressed
her against the door, her face cupped in his hands. “Lizzy,” he whispered
against her mouth. “You’re so beautiful, so sexy.”
Somewhere in a remote corner of Elizabeth’s mind, warning bells rang,
but they were overwhelmed by the insistent ache building
in her body
as the power
of William’s voracious hunger sapped her will and melted her defenses. She
moaned and laced her fingers through his hair, helpless to resist him.
He pressed
tightly against her, and Elizabeth felt his arousal against her belly. A
shudder—whether of desire or fear, or both, she
wasn’t entirely certain—passed through her. It was enough
to clear her mind at last. She pulled her lips away from his and removed his hands
from her face, pushing him gently but insistently away from her.
William stood looking at her, his chest heaving, bewilderment etched on his
features. He looked almost unbearably sexy tonight. He had left his beautifully-tailored
black blazer in the car, allowing her an unrestricted view of his black short-sleeved
sweater, which emphasized the breadth of his shoulders and clung to the outlines
of his chest. As had happened more than once that evening, she found herself mesmerized
by the wisps of chest hair peeking out above the V-neck of his sweater, and she
licked her lips reflexively. It’s just not fair.
Come on, Lizzy, stop being such a weakling. You’ve known other attractive
men, so there’s no reason to come unglued. Get your act together.
“It’s very late, William,” she began tentatively.
“Please, don’t ask me to leave, Lizzy. Not yet.”
“Well … all right. How about some coffee before you go?”
William nodded. “Sounds good.”
“Shall we put on some music?” she asked as she headed for the kitchen.
“That sounds good too.”
“Why don’t you go into the living room and pick out a CD?” she
called over her shoulder. “I haven’t gotten around to packing them yet.
I’m so far behind on my packing, it’s becoming a critical situation.
I seem to keep procrastinating about it—I don’t know why.”
Alone in the kitchen, Elizabeth grasped the counter, staring unseeing at the
faded wallpaper. She had never felt such an overwhelming attraction to a man.
Never before had she understood when friends had talked about being completely
swept away by passion, but now it was all too clear how that might happen. He’s
dangerous, no question about it. Nobody who’s that handsome should be such
an incredible kisser. He must have women lined up outside his bedroom door every
night, competing to do the honors.
Well, there’s a sobering image to keep in mind. Elizabeth bit her
lip as she switched on the coffee maker.
William stood in the living room, inspecting Elizabeth’s CD collection.
He had flipped quickly through her CD’s the previous evening at the start
of their date, and had been amused but flattered to discover that she owned what
appeared to be a complete collection of his recordings. He was about to skip past
them to see what else she had when he remembered her powerful response to his
piano solo last night. She said that it touches her heart when I play …
I think those were her words.
It seemed ungentlemanly to exploit her susceptibility to his music, but these
were desperate times. He quickly scanned her CD’s, found what he was looking
for, and loaded it into the player, nodding in approval as soft jazz piano music
began to play. Definitely the right mood.
Next he glanced around the living room, grimacing at the drab, threadbare sofa
and the scratched coffee table. It was not the sort of place in which he’d
imagined making love to her for the first time, but it would have to suffice.
Well, there’s too much light anyway. Elizabeth had switched on
a harsh overhead light on her way to the kitchen. William turned on a small floor
lamp in a corner and turned off the overhead light, plunging the room into deep
shadows that concealed many of its shortcomings. Much better.
That task complete, William ambled into the tiny, brightly-lit kitchen. He
smiled in satisfaction at the sight of a dozen rather faded yellow roses in a
vase on the table. Elizabeth stood with her back to him, watching intently as
the coffeemaker dispensed its dark, fragrant brew. He walked up behind her, wrapped
his arms around her waist, and drew her back against him. His hands sought
out the small area of bare skin at her waist, and he stroked the softness he found
there. She stiffened at his touch, but when he gathered her hair to one side and
nuzzled her neck, she sighed softly and relaxed back against him.
“Did I tell you how lovely you look tonight?” he murmured in her
ear. “I remember when you wore this blouse during our walk on the beach,
how beautiful you looked that morning. But tonight you take my breath away.”
“William,” she sighed, tipping her head to one side as his lips explored
the tender skin of her throat.
The blouse’s rolled collar prevented him from kissing his way down to
the base of her neck. That’s okay. I’ll kiss her there later, when
she’s not wearing it anymore. She tasted delicious, and he breathed deeply,
inhaling her tantalizing fragrance. He tightened his arms around her and
pressed his hips forward, rubbing himself against her in a gentle, languorous motion.
It felt impossibly good, and a low, guttural groan escaped his throat as he
redoubled his amorous attentions to her throat.
Elizabeth wiggled her way out of his arms. “Coffee’s ready,”
she said, sounding breathless.
Okay, slow down a little bit. She wants me, but she wants us to take our
time. I can do that. His self-control had been compromised by a volatile combination
of
sexual
frustration, despair over her imminent departure, and too much scotch,
but he was a gentleman. He could certainly restrain his powerful urge to scoop
her up in his arms and carry her to the bedroom at once.
Elizabeth handed him a mug of steaming coffee. “Cream or sugar?”
she asked.
He shook his head. “Black is fine.”
Elizabeth stirred some skim milk into her coffee and followed him into the living room.
She paused, hearing the music, and smiled. “I love this CD.” She picked up the CD
case, which showed William seated at the piano in a contemplative mood. The title read, ’Round
Midnight: Jazz Encores by William
Darcy.
She put the CD back on the table and sat on the sofa. “This is going to
be a little strange, sitting with you while listening to your CD. It’s like
having two William Darcys to entertain me at once.”
William sat beside her, stretching one arm across the sofa back behind her.
“Are you saying that one William Darcy isn’t enough?” he asked
with a grin.
Elizabeth’s musical laughter rang out. “Not at all. In fact, I think
I’ve got my hands full with just one of you.”
Her remark provoked an entirely different image in William’s mind, one
that sent a fresh wave of lust crashing through his system.
He draped his arm around her, drawing her close to him, and kissed the top
of her head in a lingering caress. They sat together quietly for a few minutes,
sipping their coffee and listening to the music.
Finally, William broke the warm silence. “About tomorrow night. I was
serious about my suggestion. I’m not ready to say goodbye.”
Elizabeth grimaced. “Oh, William, I don’t know. It would be nice
to see you again, but I think I’ll get my packing done faster if I don’t
have any distractions.”
“Is that all I am to you? A distraction?” William’s fingers
traced a gentle path up and down her arm, and he felt her shudder. “Let’s
find out how distracting I can be.”
He set down his coffee mug, gathered her hair out of the way, and buried his
lips against her throat. He was gratified to hear her moan as he kissed his way
up her neck to her ear. Elizabeth pulled away slightly and turned to him, her
lips parted, her breathing uneven. William took her mug from her trembling hand
and set it on the coffee table.
“Lizzy,” he whispered, cupping her cheek in his palm and leaning
toward her. He wrapped his free arm around her, pulling her close. When their
lips met, a jolt of sensual heat obliterated everything but his desire for her.
His earlier taste of her lips, rather than slaking his hunger, had made him ravenous,
and he poured every ounce of frustrated desire into his kisses, claiming her mouth
with urgent need.
He wondered, in the small portion of his brain that continued to function,
why this woman, of all the women he had ever known, drove him to such agonies
of desire, why her kisses inflamed him and robbed him of rational thought, why
her presence was as necessary to him as breathing. He didn’t know the answer—he only knew that he had to have her, not just tonight, but always.
Mindless rapture washed over him as she buried her fingers in the curls at
his nape and
tentatively darted her tongue between his lips.
With a fierce groan,
William crushed her to him, his hands sliding up and down her back and tangling
in her hair. He gasped her name against her lips as they both
dragged air into their oxygen-starved lungs.
He leaned forward, gently pushing her back until her head rested on the
sofa arm. He leaned over her, his body balanced precariously on the edge of the
sofa. As he looked down at her, his eyes burning into hers, he thought he saw
a flash of doubt. But when his mouth descended to capture hers again, she moaned
and arched against him, her hands caressing his
neck, her tongue dueling with his in a tantalizing dance.
Desperate to touch and taste every inch of her, his lips left hers and traveled
to her jaw and down her neck. He ran his hand down her arm, and then stroked his
way up the side of her
torso, brushing lightly against her breast,
while his lips
explored the softness of her cheek. He raised up slightly and gazed at her flushed
face. She reached up to smooth his hair off his forehead, and then stroked his
jaw.
The affection in her eyes sent a calming wave of tenderness through him. “Cocolina,”
he whispered, running his finger over her parted lips in a feather-light touch.
He dipped his head to hers, kissing her slowly while he caressed her face and
neck.
Soon, though, urgent heat began to build again. He knew from her moans, and
from the way her hands began to explore his back, that she felt it too. Unable
to resist temptation any longer, his hand slid down her
neck to her breast. He spread his fingers to engulf it,
feeling its warmth through her thin blouse.
Elizabeth pulled her lips away from his, her hands at his back ceasing their
caresses. “William—” she began. But
when his fingers teased her taut nipple,
she gasped and whimpered and her hands resumed their stroking.
It felt like heaven to touch her this
way, as he alternated between toying
with her nipple and massaging the firm flesh of her breast, feeling its weight
in his palm.
He leaned over to kiss her again, groaning
as he sucked her tongue into his mouth, encouraging her to explore him,
his need to possess her becoming overwhelming.
He began to unconsciously circle his hips, pressing his rigid arousal
against her and groaning her name in frustrated longing.
His hand sought out the
bare flesh at her stomach, slipping under the hem of her blouse to explore further.
Utterly captivated by the softness of her skin, he was scarcely aware that his
hand was moving
upward until his palm closed around her bare breast. The
feel of it in his hand was perfection—firm and full, yet silky soft.
He fondled her puckered nipple, and he began to draw her blouse upward, desperate
to taste her.
It took a few seconds for William’s passion-fogged brain to recognize
that Elizabeth had grabbed his arm and was telling him, in a strident voice drenched
in panic, to stop. Although he was befuddled by her frightened reaction, he promptly
slipped his hand out from under her blouse, resting it on her hip.
“Lizzy, what’s wrong?”
Elizabeth struggled into a sitting position, pulling her blouse down. “What
do you mean, ‘what’s wrong’? You were trying to undress me.”
William sat up, breathing hard, and stared at her in utter confusion. “But
I thought you—”
“Well, you thought wrong. I’m not interested in
casual sex.”
“Casual sex? Dear God, do
you really think that’s what this is about?”
“Of course. Why else would you be trying to seduce me?”
“But I’m not just interested in sex. Lizzy, I love you!”
Elizabeth’s eyes were huge. “You love me?”
William’s impulsive declaration had slipped out inadvertently, but it
was too late to deny it now. “Yes. I do.”
Elizabeth stared at him, her chest rising and falling rapidly. She reached
toward him, and for a triumphant moment William thought she was going to embrace
him. Instead, she shoved him, catching him off guard and off balance, and he fell
off the sofa and onto the floor. His shoulder bumped her coffee cup where it sat
on the table, and as it fell to the floor its contents sloshed onto William’s
sweater and slacks. He barely felt the warm liquid soaking into his clothes—he was too busy trying to comprehend the waking nightmare into which he had abruptly
descended.
“How dare you say that you love me just to get me into bed?” Elizabeth
jumped to her feet, glaring down at him where he sat sprawled on the floor.
“I didn’t. It’s the truth. I love you.” William hauled
himself awkwardly to his feet, gaping at the fury flashing in Elizabeth’s
eyes.
“Stop it. Just stop it.” Elizabeth choked out the words. “You
couldn’t possibly love me. You told me just a few weeks ago that you don’t
believe that people can fall in love in a short time. So I know you’re lying.
But I suppose you think I’m so completely under the spell of The Great William
Darcy that I’ll let you take anything you want from me. I’m sure most
women just fall at your feet, and if they don’t, you tell a few sugar-coated
lies and they can’t wait to fling themselves into your bed.”
Actually, he’d never needed to lie to attract a woman, but that was beside
the point. “I’m not lying, Lizzy. What do I need to do to prove it to
you?”
Elizabeth shook her head and blew air between her tightly-compressed lips.
“So, was this whole seduction scene supposed to happen last night at your
house? Is that why you were so annoyed by all the interruptions?”
William’s face flushed and he jammed his hands into his pockets. He attempted
to stammer a response, but Elizabeth didn’t give him a chance.
“That’s what I thought. No wonder you were so upset that Sally was
home last night when we got back here. Another opportunity lost.”
William couldn’t deny these assertions, but Elizabeth was missing a critical
point. “I don’t know why you keep insisting that all I want from you is
sex.
It’s been driving me crazy that you’re leaving New York.”
“So you thought you were entitled to a little parting gift before I left.”
“No, of course not. Why can’t you believe that I care about you?”
Elizabeth folded her arms across her chest. “Well, for openers, you’ve
never said anything about staying in touch after I move.”
“I wasn’t sure how you felt about it. If I’d been sure
that you wanted to keep seeing me … And I was going to call you, regardless.
I would have come to see you whenever I was on the West coast.”
“How convenient. A girl in every port, so you never have to sleep alone.
I suppose I would have been your California girl.”
William swallowed his annoyance. “I don’t
have ‘a girl in every port.’ In fact, right now I don’t have a
girl in any port. But, Lizzy, I want you in my life. I’ve been thinking about
you constantly, and about how much I’m going to miss you.”
“Right. You’re going to miss me so much that you didn’t even
bother to show up at the party on our last night together until almost three hours
after it started.”
“I explained that. I couldn’t help it. The charity event—”
Elizabeth’s eyes flared. “Now I understand why you were so late tonight.
You didn’t want to spend time with me, or to meet my friends. The Great William
Darcy slumming with common people? Never!”
“That’s not fair—”
“Your only interest was in taking me home and getting me into bed. So
you found some other woman—someone at your social level, I’m
sure—to spend the evening with, and then you waltzed into my party
just in time to bring me back here and collect what you came for. Did you bribe
Sally to dream up that ridiculous excuse to stay at Jon’s tonight, so she’d
be out of your way?”
William gritted his teeth as rage simmered inside of him. His pride rebelled at her insulting accusations. All I’ve done is to love her with all my heart, sacrificing my
wishes for her happiness, and this is how she treats me.
He stalked across the room, counting to ten in Italian under his breath. He smacked the “Stop” button on the CD player and turned back
to her, struggling to keep his voice calm. “You think I have so little integrity,
and so little regard for you, that I’d behave that way?”
“What else should I think? There’s something about this charity reception
that you’re keeping from me. Why be so secretive if you have nothing to hide?”
“Why do you automatically assume that I was with another woman?”
“Gee, I don’t know, Mr. ‘Classical Music’s Sex Symbol.’”
“Lizzy, that’s just something a magazine called me. It doesn’t
mean I’m a womanizer.”
“Fine, then, explain yourself. If it wasn’t another woman, what was
it?”
Mitzi’s face flashed through William’s mind.
Damn her.
I’m innocent, but Elizabeth will never believe me. He drew himself up to his
full height and smoothed his clothes, grimacing at the damp patches on his shirt
and slacks from the spilled coffee. “It was simply impossible for me to leave
sooner without being rude.”
“In other words, you’re still not explaining. Besides, you made it
clear how you felt about the party. From the moment you arrived, you couldn’t
wait to leave. You acted as though you expected to catch a fatal disease. Sitting all alone, looking down your nose at everyone—”
“I didn’t attend that party to meet your friends. I wanted to be with you. And instead I sat alone while you deserted me at every
opportunity.”
“I beg your pardon. Do you remember the Juilliard reception? I had to
wait quite a while before you were free to talk to me, but I didn’t grumble
and whine about it, or expect you to drop everything and entertain me.”
“You also didn’t have to sit and watch me snuggle up to every woman
in the room on the dance floor.”
William was pleased to see from Elizabeth’s hesitation that his retort
had found its mark. Soon, though, she recovered and went back on the attack.
“This is all beside the point,” she snapped. “I have no intention
of being the next in your long string of conquests. I guess you’ll just have
to open your little black book and find somebody else to scratch your itch. That
shouldn’t be a problem for you.”
“You make it sound like I’m some sort of Lothario,” he said,
his eyes darkening.
“And you’re saying you’re not?” Elizabeth snorted.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. What basis do you have for
accusing me of taking advantage of women?” William paced across the room,
stumbling over Elizabeth’s fallen coffee cup. He kicked it savagely, and
it rolled under a chair.
“If you want to know the truth,” he continued in a harsh tone, “I
haven’t been with a woman since … well, I can’t even remember, but it’s been months. I didn’t even have any condoms in the
house—I had to buy some yesterday.”
When William saw Elizabeth’s eyes widen in fury, he realized his mistake,
but it was too late.
“You bought condoms yesterday? How charming. I didn’t know that was
what Mrs. Reynolds meant when she said you’d done lots of planning for our
dinner date. So, how many did you bring with you tonight? I assume your wallet
is bulging with them. Or did you use some at your previous engagement?”
William stared at her in silence. It was a no-win situation. Whether
he admitted or denied the presence of condoms in his wallet, he was in serious
trouble.
“I am such an idiot,” Elizabeth continued, striding across the room
to turn on the overhead light. “I keep falling for the same routine, over
and over, thinking that a man is something special. And then I find out he’s
only interested in one thing.”
William finally lost his temper. “Why do you keep insisting that I’m
only interested in
sex?”
he bellowed.
“Are you saying that you’re not interested in going to bed with me?”
William stared at the ceiling, running both hands through his hair, and exhaled
noisily. “It would be pointless for me to deny that I want to make love to
you. What I’m saying is that it’s not my sole interest.”
Elizabeth folded her arms across her chest and regarded him with a disbelieving
expression that fed William’s anger.
“I’m sorry if it offends you,” he said, his
voice dripping with sarcasm. “I suppose it would be far more gallant if I
wanted nothing more than a chaste kiss on the brow, but as you’re already
well aware, that’s not the case. Besides, I don’t think a chaste kiss
would have satisfied you tonight either.”
Elizabeth put her hands on her hips, daggers in her eyes. “What are you
saying?”
William truculently dismissed the warning signs. “I seemed to be getting
plenty of encouragement from you. You behaved as though you wanted me as much
as I wanted you, right up till the moment when you pushed me away.”
“Now you’re calling me a tease?” The pitch of Elizabeth’s
voice rose almost to a shriek.
William’s heart sank when he realized what he had allowed himself to be
goaded into saying. “No, I didn’t mean it that way. I meant that I thought
you wanted me to do the things I was doing. I didn’t think that any of it
was unwelcome, and—”
“Get out of here, now.”
“Please, Lizzy, let me explain.”
“Oh, you’ve already done that. And don’t call me Lizzy. My friends
call me that. Now go. I don’t want you here.”
“Please, just let me say something. And then if you still want me to go,
I will.”
The two combatants stared at one another in highly-charged silence. Finally,
Elizabeth shrugged. “Fine. But make it quick.”
William looked at her with sincere contrition in his eyes. “I care about you very much, and I don’t understand why you find that so hard
to believe. I’m sorry that I tried to go farther than you wanted us to go. But,
please, we can’t let things end this way. I’ll bring dinner over
tomorrow and we can talk then. It’ll give you time to calm down, and—”
“You think I’m ever letting you back into this apartment? Not a chance.”
She stood facing him, her eyes two dangerous shards
of green glass. “You’ve had your say—now go. I don’t
ever want to see you again.”
William sighed and closed his eyes, his anger and frustration collapsing under
a heavy weight of misery. “All right. I won’t try to force you to see
me or to talk to me. But think about this. And if you decide you want to
talk, call me. I’ll be hoping to hear from you.”
“Good bye, William.”
His heart clenched at her icy tone of dismissal. “Good night, Lizzy.”
Elizabeth’s eyes narrowed at William’s intentional use of her nickname.
He turned in defeat and walked toward the door. When he reached it, he paused
and looked back, his eyes pleading with her to reconsider, but she stood as he
had left her, cold and unmoving. Despair overwhelmed him as he shut the door behind
him. He walked away slowly, listening to its thud echoing with painful finality
through the dimly-lit hallway, alone once again.
------
* – “Stairway to the Stars,” words by Mitchell Parish;
music by Matt Malneck and Frank Signorelli. Performed by Christiane Noll on Live
at the West Bank Café.

Copyright © 2006 by the author
Last updated
August 30, 2006
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